Last summer I wanted to shift my life somehow—up-level it—so I could experience more joy, vitality and purpose. I enrolled in a Landmark program called TEAM, where part of the curriculum included formulating and delivering on an individual initiative, called our “Game in the World.” Mine was (and remains) “Community to Live and Die In.” I knew that collaborating with others was essential, and I believed this program would help me shift from my lone wolf persona (often the fate of consultants) into the world of teams and teamwork.

My only concern going in to the TEAM program was my health. Would it stand up? I’ve had a history of perplexing ailments, including intermittent energy crashes that I simply can’t predict. Everything went well for the first few months but then I picked up a virus. It settled deeply in my chest and I was bedridden for two weeks.

The most intolerable symptom was the anxiety that accompanied the virus. It was relentless. My inability to mitigate it wore on me and, ten days in, on Sunday evening of the Remembrance Day weekend, I snapped and phoned my doctor’s office in a panic. Given my chest symptoms, they suggested I call 911. I did.

I could hear the sirens on their way almost immediately and soon my sleepy street was overrun with flashing lights from two emergency vehicles. The paramedics were amazing—reassuring and professional. They found nothing overtly wrong but my anxiety was so intense that I went to the emergency ward by ambulance. For someone who likes to keep a low profile, this was desperation in action.

Back home, I regretfully withdrew from TEAM. I knew I didn’t have the stamina required to finish the program. Instead, I turned my attention to my health.

I’ve taken some significant runs at resolving my health issues in the past. I initiated the first one in my late 40s, wanting to lessen menopausal symptoms with homeopathy. But the testing revealed dental toxicity, so the following year I underwent extensive and expensive dental work. Since then my attempts to resolve health issues have been ongoing, as funds and energy allow, and I generally have what I refer to as “My Fleet of Professionals” at the ready.

I was at a bit of a loss this time, however. My previous round with a naturopath had taken me a distance but then the treatment plateaued. I was better, but there was still something amiss. I had heard about Empower Health and their integrative approach so I decided to book a session.

The intake form seemed endless, but given my complex history and the amount of tests and treatment information I had accumulated over the years, I persevered.

I met with Dr. Rae, co-owner and senior naturopath. Our first appointment focused on ways to support my flagging immune system and ease the symptoms that still lingered, but the underlying issues were a large part of our conversation. She suspected a viral load, and over the coming weeks we discussed treatment options. In the end I decided to invest in some cutting-edge testing done by a lab in Germany.

The results came back quickly and definitively. Although I tested positive for Borrelia (Lyme Disease) it was not a ‘strong positive’ and my immune system appeared to be managing it. Instead, it was the Cytomegalovirus (CMV) that was most prevalent, which is part of the Herpes family.

That I had the Herpes virus was no surprise. I remember the boyfriend and how naïve I was back in my early 20s, as well as the shame I felt in my 30s when I realized that I’d contracted it.  This article from the Washington Post states that ‘pretty much everyone has herpes’ and goes on to say that 90% of the population who carry the CMV-2 virus (genital herpes) haven’t experienced symptoms and don’t know they have it.

I began the prescribed protocol about five weeks ago. The down side is occasional bouts of feeling crappy (like today), the uncertainty of when they might hit, the anxiety that accompanies them, and the cost of the treatment. All that said, I’m cautiously hopeful that in the coming months I will feel healthier and more stable than I have for decades. Fingers crossed!

Is there something in your life that requires your attention before you can move to more creative endeavours? Let me know, I’d love to hear!